Peyton, 19

What is your favorite word? There’s so many, I actually have a list when I was growing up and when I was doing speech therapy. I always like words that sound different and the way they feel when I say it.

What is your least favorite word? I hate the words, fleshy and moist. I also don’t like the name Emily and Sarah just because how it feels when I say it, but I don’t hate the person. 

How would you like to die? I like this kind of questions, I don’t prefer small talks. I wanna go out cool, I want people to say… “Oh, you know how she died?!” Maybe being 80 years old and dying from a heart attack at a rave. I think I’ll know closer to death, the worst is dying suddenly when you’re young and not being able to say goodbye to your family. 

If you find out that you’re dying, who would you tell first? Definitely my parents but it is something that I would not tell a lot of people about.  I always never let anybody know so they won’t treat me any different or pity me. 

What is your idea of perfect happiness? Freedom is a big thing for me. Being tied down to one place or having constant in my life won’t make me happy. Staying behind the white picket fence is not for me, I can’t stay in one spot. For other people, we live in a very materialistic world wherein we hold on to many things and I believe people are not meant to do that. 

What is your current state of mind? I’m 19 and at this point in my life, I think about how from all of a sudden being kid to starting a job and living real life. 

How is the transition from childhood to adulthood? It is so sudden. Today a lot of times they’ll cuddle their children and protect them from the world which is okay but being sheltered and being dependent, you’ll never build those skills to be on your own.

What do you consider as your greatest achievement? The lives I’ve influenced. When I started modeling, I’ve never thought that my little face will reach many people around the world and touched their lives. 

In what way did you influence them? I’ve never had a lot of friends and always isolated, I learned how to encouraged people to open up.

Do you find it draining or exhausting (Being a prominent figure in social media)? I try to listen because you never know if you’re the only person they can talk to you about this. I try not to give advise because everybody has their own life but when I do and it happens again then maybe a little bit. But I truly enjoy listening to people open up to me. 

If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? Physically, I always wished I’m a little bit taller. Emotionally, I find lying to myself a lot where I’ll catch myself blaming other people instead of acknowledging what I can control. I’m still working on it where I catch myself saying, it is really my fault and that is okay as long as I don’t do it again. 

What is your greatest struggle so far? Finding out where I stand in this lovely world of ours. 

What do you do for self-care? Napping and I enjoy reading. 

What is your motto in life? Do you know the Beatles song,  The Ballad of John and Yoko, there’s a line that says, The only thing you take is your soul and I think that is true.

What do you look forward to the most in life? School as I’m starting university this fall, taking up designing.

If all the people here will stop what they’re doing and will listen to you, no judgments and wholeheartedly, what will you tell them? What you’re worried about right now will probably won’t matter in a year. 

If heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates? I want to see my statistics like how many people I pissed or inspired and most of all.. how many people I helped.